Thursday, May 29, 2014


I've officially erased what I have written today FIVE times and just decided, ya know what, FK it!  Yesterday was my birthday, and not that I've ever been one to hold my tongue (or stop my fingers from typing), I'm just going to tell my story and not give a flying hoot who I offend!  Actually, the person I was thinking about is so self-involved she wouldn't notice if I walked up and painted her face pink, so it really doesn't matter anyway.  Wow, now I've built this little story up to be far more interesting than it actually is.  I loathe outdoor makeover shows.  They make me cringe.  A few years ago I had the pleasure of working on one and couldn't believe how obnoxious the host was, and believe me, I've worked with some difficult people!  Not only was she totally disengaged from the crew, she ignored the sweet elderly couple we were helping, and had nothing to do with the design (yet took all of the credit).  Now, mind you, I use the term "design" loosely here, as the complete wreck of a "design" mess created for these people made me want to join Edward Snowden in isolation.  If I see one more cheesy DIY project some foolish talking head forces a "regular" person to participate in, I'm throwing out my television and canceling our cable.  Busy, useless props in a design scheme are simply that…useless.  In order to create a lovely outdoor space, whether a huge yard in the country or tiny porch in the city, one doesn't need an overly coiffed television host telling them what to do, instead a little time and creativity goes a long way.  Lighting is everything, and each summer I find cooler products at places like Ikea with their solar-powered lanterns and string lights, I love to hang from trees over a sitting area.  In tighter spaces with little room for an outdoor kitchen or bar, I like to add drop shelves like the one above.  When the crowd arrives, prop it up to serve lunch or cocktails, when they leave drop it back down.  So don't let a spaced out designer tell you to spray paint your pavement orange or install a merry-go-round in your backyard when you don't have children, look around your outer space and get creative! Email your pictures to me at and I'll walk you through a design scheme (not scam) that will work for you!